Monday, December 15, 2008

I love my couch.

Especially after working 65 hours out of the last six days.

It was kind of slow, so not a lot to report. But there were some things!

I had a 97-year-old man reach for me and yell, "I HAVE A NEED TO MARRY YOU AND SLEEP WITH YOU!!!" I told him thanks for the offer, but I'm already married. He said, "BUT I LOVE YOU!" and then proceeded to plant whiskery kisses all the way up my arm. It was actually kind of sweet.

I got shocked by a patient's internal cardiac defibrillator. It felt like a rubber band snapping on my hand. I didn't think that could happen!

We got a woman with a ruptured ectopic pregnancy up to the OR in record time. I don't even remember how fast it was, but MAN, it was fast. As they were wheeling her away she made them stop to thank me for being so nice to her. I was actually rendered speechless.

I had a chance to remind a young guy how fortunate he was. He came in after his doctor had called to tell him about some abnormal labs that turned up after a blood draw during a routine physical. He was asymptomatic, but the lab values indicated some severe blood dyscrasia or immune system failure. Needless to say, he was a little freaked. I had time, so I drew his blood in triage, sent him outside to register, and then went inside to see the docs so they could order the appropriate labs.

An hour later, his labs were back--all within normal levels. I explained to him there must have been a mixup at the lab his first samples were sent to. He rolled his eyes and said, "Yeah, and I just spent a hundred bucks to find that out."

I said, "No, you spent a hundred bucks to find out you aren't deathly ill. Merry Christmas."

He smiled and said, "I guess that's a better way to look at it."