I'm sitting here watching a DVD of Entourage and enjoying a mindless afternoon of TV and knitting. Sometimes I wish I could be an agent's assistant like they see on those shows. Sure, it's a high pressure job. Sure you get all sorts of abuse. Sure you work around the clock dealing with mostly idiots. And my guess is that the pay is not great.
But I'd never have to deal with seeing a baby be delivered at seven months' gestation by emergency c-section because the mother had a sudden cardiac arrest while having a leisurely brunch with her husband and his family.
Neither the mother nor the baby made it.
As an assistant to some high-powered entertainment executive I'd have to do a lot of nonsense, like answering the phone and stuff and would have a Blackberry and would have to listen to a lot of crap.
But I wouldn't ever have to listen to the husband sob uncontrollably and beg the cops to "tell me she's still breathing! Tell me SHE'S OK!" and then call her name over and over.
I have never been more happy to have a couple days off. So far I've eaten some delicious fried dumplings and a coconut bun, and I got to snuggle in bed with my husband and dogs. And I am so, so lucky and grateful to have them for every second I do.
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Oh Gah. The hypothetical knife in my chest just twisted around and brought tears to my eyes. No, it couldn't have been the hypothetical situation. Nah.
Unfortunately, I have a story or three like that myself. Which might be one reason why I am now the token nurse in the IT department...
G.G.
I know. In my previous job, I spent a great deal of quality time in a E.D. It eats a hole in you. You do the best you can, but sometimes people die.
I will say this however. If I were to get shot or cut up, I would rather have you working on me than countless others I know who call themselves health care givers. You see, the fact that it bothered you so badly shows that you still give a damn for your patients. That is something very special. Don't lose it.
Stay strong.
Ouch, point taken!
~hugs~
Those are the days that stick in your craw and gnaw at your gut. Those are the events that make you go home and hug your wayward kids, pee on the floor pets and unshaven husband.
Its what we do. Someone's got to do it.
It doesn't get any easier, though.
I hate days like these, really puts life in perspective for us.
"Sure, it's a high pressure job. Sure you get all sorts of abuse. Sure you work around the clock dealing with mostly idiots. And my guess is that the pay is not great."
Wow, that sounds like my job. Actually, that sounds like all jobs in the medical field, especially nursing. lol
Poor girl...
Ya know... I spent a good deal of time working in politics--fundraising in particular. I spent every waking hour(literally--20 hours a day) by the side of a Congressman. I met millionaires--even a few billionaires. I worked with the most successful trial lawyers in the country and I got to fly in private jets.
You know what I didn't ever get there... I didn't get my heart broken--not like I do here... But I didn't ever REALLY make a difference.
Sure, we spend 11 hours of a 12 hour shift trying to dig through the shit that our patients spew from their mouths while complaining that healthcare is too slow... But every once and a while... just every so often--WE DO GET TO DO SOMETHING THAT MAKES YOU WALK OUT TO YOUR CAR WITH A SMILE ON Y0UR FACE AND THAT LITTLE WARM FEELING IN YOUR HEART THAT ONLY YOU CAN KNOW.
Keep your head up.
oh wow... curious, why the cardiac arrest?
While I may not say it at the time I am having a day like this, I would rather be taking care of people than doing some froufrou job.
Working in another job, you don't completely avoid these patients, you just encounter them far less often. You cannot avoid tragedy.
We all deal with it differently, but how you handle it is important. Remind yourself of all of the patients you have been able to help. All of the patients who have thanked you for making a difference in their lives.
The lows can be very low, but I think that things balance out.
Fuck.
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