Not like most of you care, but I figured I'd share anyway:
I called customer service, and they told me that since my Roomba is past warranty, and since they don't have a repair service, they would offer me a deal: A new Roomba Sage, which is basically the same one I have, just a different color, or a brandy-new Roomba at a discounted price.
The Sage they offered me is a bare-bones model. It doesn't even come with a charger or battery, which was fine with me, since I'm just going to use the ones from my current dead Discovery. The cost for this option? $100. Also, since it's new, from them, I get a new warranty!
I would have loved to splurge on a discount on one of the new models, but the one that I want is around $260 or so, even with the reduced price.
Eh, whatever. I just want my Roomba back. The dog-hair tumbleweeds are piling up!