Out in triage, patient relations person comes in: "Do we ever just check a blood pressure? There's a 63-year-old lady out here who is asking."
Eh, it wasn't crazy busy at the moment, so I said, "Ok, send her in."
Lady: I just need my pressure checked.
Me: If it's really high, I might want you to stay to see a doctor.
Lady: Screw that, just check it.
Me: Well okey doke then. (Pressure is 145/93, pulse 87) Your pressure is a little elevated. Do you take your medications at home?
Lady: Always. Well, no. Sometimes.
Me: Have you been taking them lately?
Lady: No.
Me: Why not?
Lady: Well, pregnancy.
Me: Whose pregnancy?
Lady: Mine! I'm pregnant with St Francis of Assisi's baby! A little mouse lives in my uterus. I'm not staying around here when you OBVIOUSLY don't know what you're doing. (Storms out.)
Me: Well, allrighty. Bye now.
Wonder what OTHER meds she's not taking.
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5 comments:
YIKES! :)
The nurses would do off the street BPs at our hospital too if they weren't being slammed with pts.
One of my pet mice has gone missing.
Uh oh....
You know, this was the second female-anatomy/mouse reference I've heard from a crazy person. When I was in nursing school doing a psych ward rotation, a woman told me that at night, a mouse crawled in her vagina and out of her mouth.
I said the only thing I could think of to say: "That must be very scary for you!"
That was actually a good response...to empathize with her.
I know! that's what the nursing textbooks say to do. Who knew it worked?!
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